Monday, December 1, 2014

Crosby.

Breaking radio silence…….I feel like myself a little bit this morning which means I'm ready to write.  Life has been a whirlwind, for lack of a stronger term, the last three weeks.

This picture…..
was taken at 7:45 p.m. in the girls bathroom at Georgia's school on Monday, November 10th.  We were waiting for her parent teacher conference to start.  It's weird looking back at this picture knowing that this was the exact time my adoption social worker was leaving a message on our home answering machine "to please call her as soon as we got home." It's this surreal moment frozen in time for me--the last picture I'd take with G before life changed.

When we got home that night about 8:30 there was that message.  I know what messages like that mean; they mean your heart skips a beat, you start sweating, you get shaky, and you kind of have a hard time focusing on doing what you need to do first.  We put Georgia to bed and gave our social worker a call back.

And sure enough she told me what I was expecting her to say--there was a little boy born at 4:00 that afternoon and his parents wanted to meet us--they wanted to make an adoption plan.   Could we drive across the state to meet them in the morning?

"Give me 15 minutes to puke collect my thoughts and for Chris and I to have a conversation and I'll call you back," I told her.

And of course when I called her back we told her we'd be there by noon the next day.

We had nothing ready for a baby. Yes, we started the adoption process last year--but never guessed we'd be one of the 3-4 adoptions our agency did a year that were 100% last minute.  Stupid.  Thinking that definitely guaranteed that we would be.
We owned zero, ZERO, clothes for a boy.
We didn't really have a name picked out (I mean….I did….we just hadn't agreed).

And we'd had no idea that it was going to be our last night with G as just her.  And that…..that was hard for me….not because I wasn't excited about a baby….but because life was going to change so fast and we hadn't had time to savor those last few moments of what had been for the past five years; the three of us.  But I forced myself to push through those feelings knowing what we ultimately wanted and we started making phone calls and resurrecting car seats, and burp clothes, and the one little outfit that was sort of unisex from the basement.

I called my mom and dad and my sister and my friends Rachel and Karen and cried and freaked out and they all shrieked with excitement and laughed and were speechless and couldn't wait to hear more.

********

On Tuesday morning, the 11th, we drove across the state to meet this little guy and his parents and our incredible social worker who is so, so, so good at walking us through every stage of adoption and giving us the right words to say, ways to express our emotions, and an objective train of thought.  We spent a few hours talking with Crosby's parents; discussing names (that's always a tricky conversation), plans, life, what was next, and stressing to them how much we desired an open adoption.

They were discharged and we remained in the hospital for the night with Crosby (staying overnight in a hospital--seriously not on my top 10 of awesome things to do list).  On Wednesday evening the hospital pediatrician gave us the green light to head home and so we bundled up this adorable little guy and headed out into the cold night to drive back across the state as fast as was safe so we could introduce him to his new big sister.  Our amazing friends had gotten to our house first to set up our pack and play, drop off a tub full of diapers, wipes, formula, clothes, blankets, and bottles.  It made coming home so nice, so much calmer, and much less chaotic.





It felt good to get home (Georgia had been extremely sick while we were gone--welcome to the world of two kids, huh?), good to start settling into our new normal, good to come to the shocking realization that we're now a family of four, and so so so good to smell that new baby smell.  

I have so many thoughts…..they're all coming back up the surface after the fog of the last month…..so I'm excited for some more days at home where I can get them into this space.  

Be back soon!  

5 comments:

  1. I had chills the whole time I read this! Congratulations! He is absolutely PERFECT :-)

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  2. Congratulations to your sweet family of four!

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  3. So incredibly excited for your whole family! I love checking in here any day but today was so extra special! I can't wait to continue following your journey as a family of four.

    Kristine

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  4. Congratulations Maggie! So happy for you 4! I have a friend who is in the exact same position right now and just waiting for that call any day now. Hope you are all adjusting well. Can't wait to hear more about your journey!

    Jen (Ingalls) Kang

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  5. I've been waiting to read this! Congrats!!!

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