I'm about to engage in some. It's really annoying, I know. I tell Georgia all day, "I can only hear little girls who don't whine and talk in a big girl voice." It usually works. Someone please say that to me if you think I need it after you read this.
Let me set the scene for you--and it's a winding and rabbit trailing scene if ever there was one.
Recently Georgia has decided that she is afraid to go to her room by herself to do ANYTHING. Get her shoes, put her dolly away, get a basket of fake food, grab a book, turn on her music, and really just about everything and anything. Keep in mind these are all things she could do with ease less than two weeks ago. Now--the mention of going to her room on her own sends her into full body sobs and rolls on the floor.
A real fear? That will pass (hopefully soon).
Two year old manipulation that she thinks gets her out of something?
A sudden onset of lack of confidence?
Who knows? We've tried a lot of tactics to work through this and I don't think it would matter if I said Dora and Hello Kitty were in her room in the flesh with a fresh pan of brownies, some Lady Gaga music, and a bowl of pesto cavatappi from Noodles & Company--she's not having a trip to her room on her own. It's a really neat little phase.
Anyway--we were at the library yesterday and I noticed they had a whole section of books for little kids on "coping." Coping with lots of different things; divorce, a new baby, potty training, death, asthma, Alzheimer's, peanut allergies, moving to a big girl bed, and even being afraid of things.
(These are all the book on "coping." There were tons of them. )
A ha. I scooped that puppy up and flipped through it. It was mediocre. I decided it would actually introduce more things to be afraid of so I skipped it.
Work with me here. I'm moving away from the "being afraid thing." I just needed to mention it so you'd know why I was looking at the books on coping in the library. The whining is about to start.
I went back to the book on moving to a big girl bed. We're going to move Georgia out of her crib at Christmas and do the whole bed thing (sniff). I thought--"this could be a good book to get." And then I got to this page in the book............
Really? Really? REALLY? I guess adopted kids don't need books on moving to a big girl bed. Only biological kids struggle with this, hence the mention of growing out of your 'mommy's tummy.'
And this is the kind of stuff that drives me crazy as an adoptive mom and really drives home the point how infrequently adoption is thought of as a way to have a baby in our society; that a book about something as simple as moving to a big girl bed can't be used in our household because Georgia
never outgrew my tummy.
So then I started looking for books on being adopted in the "coping" section. Two. Don't forget how big that section was. Two books on adoption. Doesn't' this one look current and eye catching?
Yep....there's the publication date.
There was also this one......
and it's okay. I actually love Todd Parr's books and highlight another one of his books over at Mom Colored Glasses as a great adoption book. This one is just so-so. It's a little sad. And I have a strong disdain for sad adoption books.
This whole coping shelf in the library though just left me feeling frustrated. I don't understand why there isn't more out there (even a fraction of what's there for biological kids) for adopted kids that celebrates adoption, how their family was built, the heritage they have, and for goodness sake's--how to sleep in a big girl bed.
I guess I'll just have to write my own.
Stay tuned.
